November 12, 2010

• i asked you not to
  i begged you

  in the memory of my own demise
  in the soul
  in the heart

  i asked you to stop
  but you keep on
  keeping on

  in ways i can’t

  but you won’t listen
  hear
  or care

  so it sits next to me
  staring up at me

  testament
  testimonial

  to who we are
  and what we’ve become

  and every time i look at it
  it breaks my heart
  kills my soul
  and does damage

  to every fiber of my being

  i asked you not to do
  the things you do

  to stop
  to give up
  to go home

  to be someone else
  to something else
  other then me

  because nothing is worth
  what we’ve been through

  not life
  not love
  not us

  but the words keep falling down
  pouring from my mouth
  like hemlock from a glass

  or cyanide in pill form

  and there is nothing
  will be nothing
  but the forever after

  of a two people
  coasting on fumes
  exiting stage right

  every time something falls apart
  every time life gets to tough

  doesn’t that tell you who we are
  doesn’t that speak to some part of you
  you’ve never seen

  doesn’t it move you

  to change
  to fix
  to overcome
  to make new

  all the things we should of done years ago
  doesn’t it do anything at all

  even if it’s just incremental screaming
  quiet suffering
  heartbroken failure

  even if it’s just talking for hours
  till we remember who we were
  or forget what we’ve done

  but it doesn’t:

  doesn’t change you
  doesn’t move you
  doesn’t make you see

  and this is where we are
  this
  is who we’ve become

  so i’m asking you
  i’m begging you

  in the memory of my own demise
  in the soul
  in the heart

  to stop
  please

  just stop.

  • 8:50 am
  • 1 Comment